"Even if my life is just a single drop, every drop of water leaves ripples."

App logo of Ripples

Hey guys, I am back for a blog update! I guess the blue moon appeared tonight. hehe


Well I had download a game from the App Store today. However, it was not a game at all--despite the fact that it is in the game category. It is called Ripples, and it is actually a novel. According to the information given, it is "an inspiring short and sweet interactive story, with beautiful art, and featuring voiced characters." For those who do not own a Mac or any sort of Apple related devices, you can read it here: http://vnovel.info/ripples/


Surprisingly, I was moved by the tale, and it has influenced my nihilistic ways~~ ^ ^ ㅋㅋㅋㅋ


I guess I just wanted to share it with my fellow colleagues before the semester ends. I am sure many are struggling on their research papers right now, but take a chance to look at this when taking a break from work. Well good luck with researching and good luck with finals! :)

Fin

--I don’t know why, but Tuesdays always seem to suck extra. 

Those were the thoughts that struck me every week. Yeah, I admit that I disliked blogging at first, but I learned how to later enjoy it. It has helped me learn more about my colleagues in a way I probably wouldn’t if it was just sitting at classroom for an hour, twice a week. Furthermore, these class blogs gave off a different outlook and judgment. Besides the evaluation and analysis of one’s form of writing and content, I really like that there was less assumption because no one can base it off appearance, age and background. Therefore, it had made the problems and situations of our stories anonymously, and the responses that were often given were useful advices and positive feedbacks.

But because I normally restrain myself from telling the world too much information, I thought that there might be no need to continue this blog. I sure many of us have other social networks such as Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, etc; so I am uncertain whether this blog will continue. Maybe once in a blue moon. Haha,I prefer writing informally on the internet anyway, and a blog habitually gives the feel like I am obliged to write otherwise. On the contrary, I am writing casually because this is the our final assignment! WOOHOO! 

That's all Folks!

Hungry For Some Salsa?

 

One of my fondest memories was trying salsa dancing. A friend had asked me to join along with a few of his friends. When the idea was first brought to mind, I thought of a classroom with an instructor teaching a dance session. Instead, I was brought to a place that was similar to a club. However, this club had an actual band playing rather than a Dj with mixed records blasting through enormous speakers. It was more lively and bright, unlike a typical nightclub. Also, most of the people there were of all ages and were very friendly. This club also had a bar, pool tables, and a saddle for a disco light, which I particularly remember because it was quite odd but interesting.

On the dance floor stood a man which I believed was the instructor for he carried a microphone that hung around his ear. For each step he lead and explained, his partner and other dancers followed. For a moment, my friends and I just found ourselves watching until one of them decided to enter the dance floor. Soon, everyone else followed along and began learning the steps one by one.

As a past dancer, I learned the moves fairly quickly. It was a lot easier than I had expected. Previously watching Dancing with the Stars, I thought the beginners class was already going to be intense! After the lecture was over, the band just continued to play for everyone to enjoy. I guess it is expected since it was a club after all. But I didn't expect to have so much fun dancing smoothly to music in a different style and to music I couldn't quite understand. I must say that that day was a pretty awesome experience!

Professor Bullyism

Also known as the modern day term: "Professor bullyism"

This is just another undirected and nonspecific blog entry.
As far as you all know, we are now entering a week long holiday where we are bombarded with major projects, exams, and last minute assignments due before the week of finals. Thus, I wanted to share an event that happened not to long ago. Just two days ago, I had felt the compassion and deep affection from one of my professors when they had called me out for spelling the word diarrhea correctly in an email. 
Obviously, you know what that means- the beginning of professor bullyism! 
So I am clearly exaggerating the point, but I was completely humiliated. Thanks! :)


Oh, as for my fellow bloggers, blog entry #14 is below. ^ ^

Truly Great Friends are Hard to Find, Difficult to Leave, and Impossible to Forget

 

Considering someone important is when a person becomes a considerable influence to oneself. Of course, about every individual we have met in our lifetime has played an important matter in our course of history, but only those who actually give us the sense of meaning of importance are the ones who stand besides us today. Thus, Kimchi Huynh and Ian Cahatol are the two that have become such inspiration. No other friend can compare to their guidance and support they continue to give and share. Thus gives the reason why there is not a third person.

Kimchi has been my best friend since the seventh grade. October 8th, 2004 is the date we like to recall. It is the day that brought us together with tears and joy. It had begun of our never-ending journey as two friends, and as two sisters.


It started with a couple of girls who shared the same feelings towards the same boy, who later revealed his feelings to me, unluckily. This had caused so much anger and hate, feelings that no one would ever wish for. However, it was Kimchi who had my back when these girls decided to show their affection of hate. If only I knew that I would end up in this situation, I would of never liked the guy back! Even if it was one of the worst experiences to have as a child, it also became a memorable one. Since it is now the past, it is one of the few things we look back into and laugh about.


Although, we may live in different cities now, we have never failed to keep in touch. When we have the time, we visit one another as frequently as we can. We both still find enjoyment from talking about boys like young teens do. As far as college goes, we still manage to help one another with almost anything from schoolwork to dating tips to wardrobe malfunctions!

Ian Cahatol, on the other hand, has always been like my mentor. Any situation I happen to be stuck in, he always knew what to say! If not the answer, he always had an alternative up his sleeve. Although, he is often caught in a serious mood, he is very lighthearted and witty.


Whenever I have those bad days, Ian is just the right person to talk to, and it is not because he says what he wants for you to hear. Ian is very honest, and will not hesitate to say anything that comes to mind. If I ever feel blue, red, or ever green, (sad, angry, or ever jealous), he lets me evaluate it. Then he will tell me the possible reason why the event even occurred, or what I can do now to fix it. Ian always gives me hope and motivation, because he is one of the few friends that still believe in me when I finally have ceased to believe in myself.


With every call, Ian is always there with a helping hand. Continually giving reason to look forward to each day. College maybe a hassle and may help add on the extra pounds, but Ian and I made a deal that once our first year is over and when he’s in town, we will have to make at least a three mile run together. Thus, motivating myself to not forget about my health and give away to laziness.



“Friendship is a building contract you sign with laughter and break with tears,” and I think that agreement was made since I had bonded and grown with Kimchi and Ian. Both have been such inspiration to me. They are both smart and can be anything they set their mind to. Like they say, “Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget.”

Slow and Steady Always Wins the Race!

Little did I know, there is already an app for it! (iphone)*
(However, it is not free!ㅠㅠ)

A few months ago, my uncle had introduced me to “Couch to 5k.” Asking him what it was, he told me to Google it. I felt offended at first, thinking that he was indirectly calling me a ‘couch potato.’ Apparently he needed a partner to run along with him, to hold the stopwatch, and keep time. I never liked running to begin with, but after thinking it through, I knew that this would be a great way to avoid the ‘Freshman 15.’ Is it true that college students pack on ten to fifteen pounds during their first year at school? Well I decided I was not going to wait for that answer and tried the running plan instead. I have nothing to lose, right?

            Couch-to-5k is simply a beginner’s running program. It can take someone who is not an athlete and who does not have any exercise experience whatsoever to later have the ability to become a runner at the end of nine weeks, at the least! I believe the great thing about this running plan is that it is not so overwhelming. By only committing to three days a week for twenty minutes a day, it is feasible to anyone! Saves anyone on monthly/annual gym memberships, and other necessary tools (like dumbbells, yoga mats, etc.) that may be needed for a workout. All you need is a pair of nice, comfortable shoes, running area (such as the park or around the block), and twenty minutes.

            Did I interest you into trying this running program? I will place the link below so you can see the workout schedule yourself! Like it, bookmark it, or ignore it, but I am sure that I have got you thinking about it. For whatever reason you may want to try it, there are a few tips I would like to share with you.

            Maybe, the first things that may come to mind is – how shall I motivate myself for the next nine weeks? I know plenty hate running in general, but if you have a goal, anything is attainable. Maybe nine weeks is too fast, so you can simply repeat each week until you are comfortable in to moving on to the next week’s running schedule. The goal is not really for you to reach three miles in exactly nine weeks; it is just an estimate. Everyone has different ways to drive themselves, but just as long as you keep up with three days a week, twenty minutes a day, it is very possible that you will achieve it.

            Also, do not expect to get fast results. Running is not initially about weight loss. (Just remember that you’re helping your heart!) Everything takes time, so looking in the mirror every few seconds while comparing yourself to a picture of a model will not do much good, but will rather make you depressed and less motivated instead. (However, there are some who actually gain more motivation from it. It really depends on the person.)

            Additionally, keep in mind that speed does not matter. You should not be in any rush anyway; it is about the distance and resistance! (Does that make any sense?) Plus, make sure you run outside! Believe me, you get better results with running outside than running on a treadmill.

            Hope I have enlightened you with this small review. Whether you make the choice to run or not, just remember that slow and steady always wins the race!

The Couch-to-5k Running Plan:

http://www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181.shtml

Feeling Like Strangers, again

"The most unfortunate fact about a relationship that doesn't work out, is the inevitable path both parties are on to become strangers. Many relationships follow a general path, through a set of different stages, one that brings two strangers together, takes them through a period of deep emotions and meaningful experiences, then returns them to where they began." -WongFu



I was unable to update with a new blog post last week, so I have decided to entertain you with a video. 
Maybe it will also explain my emotions lately..

New Pairs of Shoes

Caught your attention huh? too bad my post today is boring.
(Found this picture on someone's tumblr)*

Number 5 was the truth to my last blog, so congrats to Florence and Roianthony for getting it correct! (Pretty unfair when your friends already know.) Haha, well I’m pretty glad how light the online workload is this week! I’m actually serious about it! No sarcasm at all! I had a few exams to study for this week, so I had plenty of time to focus without distraction or getting worried about other schoolwork. So thank you Prof. Croker, I’m very grateful for this week! 

However, school has been good and bad to me lately. I guess spring isn’t my season because I always feel less motivated and have a less drive to continue forward. Spring just seems to have more loops; it feels like riding another roller coaster in the form of a corkscrew. Whereas the ride can bring a thrilling element that later ends with knots in my hair and a twist in my stomach, leaving me quite unsteady every time.

I am actually very disappointed in myself that I have dropped another class and I am no longer a full time student. But even as a student with eleven credits, I am still having trouble with a few of my classes. I am already starting to have doubts on whether I should continue my major because I really dread spending time in a science lab.

I really have to agree with Prof. Croker’s proverb, “perfection leads to paralysis that causes procrastination,” because every time I had aimed for perfection, it had only lead me into procrastinating more than ever. Since I began college, I wanted to lose the high school behavior. I had thought perfection was an answer. Just as long as I didn’t make mistakes, my path would only lead to success. Obviously I was wrong, but certain mistakes can sometimes make a great impact that causes one to be less motivated than before. I later realized that if we use these mistakes correctly and learn from them, it makes us a better person (never perfect).

Lately, I haven’t been able to keep my focus since a couple of minor mishaps that occurred around spring break, which is still bothering me in some way. Nevertheless, I try to keep my chin up and find ways to keep me motivated. Like finding a way to reward myself for every week I complete without missing class and without failing to turn in work, then I would give myself a day of work-free and maybe go shopping! Maybe even reward myself with new pairs of shoes! J

EVERYBODY LIES.

Do any of you watch House? Haha, pretty good series.

So here are my five lies and one truth blog entry. Try to determine the TRUTH from the LIES! lol

1. I was an extra in the movie, Water for Elephants.

2. I won my 2^nd grade spelling bee.

3. I advertised for Pampers as a baby.

4. I invented the Charadium app for the App Store.

5. I auditioned for SM Entertainment.

6. I met Justin Bieber before he was famous.


Please make a guess before reading any comment below. Also, I advice my readers to take note that I use plenty of sarcasm, so don't take any of my blogs seriously. I don't ever mean to offend anyone, I simply just type whatever comes to mind.. at the right moment and time.  LOL

Be a Genius - Three Simple Ways to Look Smart

Being "nerdy" or "geeky" has now become a new hot fad and nothing is better than making yourself look incredibly smart to impress somebody. However, not all of us are smart, so here are a few notes on how to get the "look."

First thing to do is grab a dictionary and start using BIG words. There is no better way to boost confidence and self-esteem by using large vocabulary because having an extensive and abundant terminology is one of the best ways to advance your knowledge. (Don't you wish we knew this before we took our SAT?)

Another way to look ridiculously smart is to wear glasses even if you do not need them. These "fake glasses" will help create a slightly smarter look. There is no stronger symbol of knowledge and wisdom than a pair of spectacles resting on the bridge of your nose because the smart people in history, such as Benjamin Franklin and Ghandi, wore glasses! Nowadays, you don't even need bad eyes to wear them. Local shopping marts are already selling glasses with no prescription for a bunch of hipsters who keeps up with the latest trends.

Finally, the third way to look smart is to always pretend that you are reading or doing homework. Pretending to study is the epitome of asserting how smart you are to others. So next time a friend sends a text asking, "hey, what's up;" reply back by saying that you are busy reading the encyclopedia for a midterm coming soon. But whom am I kidding - your friend would be a real idiot to buy that because no one reads encyclopedias when we live in the digital age; everyone uses Wikipedia now!

So instead of just keeping with the latest fashion, why not use your knowledge and be a genius!

Until We Lose a Great Friend

“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is one of the lessons I had learned as a child from an Aesop fable. My memory of the story is quite faint of a boy who liked a girl through her beautiful appearance that later realized that she was malevolent and vile. From this book, I had learned about many morals, however, it was this certain quote that had always struck me most.  Although I am taught great advice, I habitually take it for granted. Not that it is intended, but there are times were we also don’t take our own advice. So I often catch myself subconsciously judgmental.

I have been called judgmental several times in my life, but I didn’t consider it to be a bad behavior at the time. I was just looking after my own interest. There seems to be a line of thought that those who are influenced by a beautiful appearance are of a lesser moral character that those who do not. However, it has been argued that we are all influenced by appearances, and that there is no moral advantage in ignoring them.

I guess we do not see these problems until another person becomes involved. Similar to the Aesop fable, I was like the boy. However, I was not involved in falling in love through appearance, it was vice versa. It started around the time were everyone was hitting puberty. Though I still do not see it in myself, I was quite a popular girl when it came to boys, especially during the month of love. I have always abhorred the fourteenth of February, but when it came, I was always showered with flowers, chocolates, and gifts. I was never the affectionate type, so it was easy to refuse to such nonsense at the time.

It did not hit me until one of my best friends found some sort of fondness in me. However, I turned him down just like any other because he did not complete my type based on appearance. It continues until we do not realize that we had just lost a completely great friend.

Challenges in Family Relationships and How Having a Support System Makes Life Much Easier

In most family cases, there is abandonment. Family is whom we look to when we need help. We expect our parents to raise us, our grandparents to love us, and our brothers and sisters to always be there for us when we are often down. Because they are our blood, we depend on that connection. However, when a family member doesn’t live up to our expectations, we feel abandoned. When a parent, grandparent, or older brother or sister puts their needs in front of our own, we may feel abandoned and alone. Furthermore, we are likely to feel sad, alone and angry.

Although brothers and sisters love each other, there will always be a form of sibling rivalry. Nevertheless, when it comes to defending a sibling, there is no doubt that brothers and sisters will defend each other. The irony is that sometimes they cannot say a respectful word to one another. They will love each other, but they regularly can’t stand each other. Brothers and sisters live so close together that they can’t help but compare themselves to each other. Normally, one will have talent in an area where the other doesn’t and this may feel threatening. The only way to combat sibling rivalry is to nurture a secure sense of self so that no one else can be seen as a threat to an individual’s place in the family unit.

It is an unfortunate fact that divorce has become ordinary in our society. Often, family members will be puzzled on how to act around a now divorced couple. The pain and torment the divorce creates can deeply affect a family unit. Children are typically torn between their mother and father, and are, in most cases, the ones who suffer throughout the relationship the most. However, a divorce may be necessary in situations when a relationship can’t be saved.

Therefore, part of the reality of life is hardship. Every day brings new challenges. Living with the expectation that life will be difficult makes hard times easier to deal with. When a family encounters hard times they will need to join together and face the challenge as a team. They will need to be sympathetic to the needs of each individual family member who will face unique difficulties. Life is not easy, but having a support system makes life much easier. 

Proud to Call Myself a Winner

I constantly have the desire to learn art and music. I have this mindset that by having the ability to understanding both points are similar to understanding another language. As a young child, I was always curious about what I saw or what I had heard; how colors were mixed into creating another hue or how vibration produces sound. Maybe my curiosity is due to my father's passion towards art and music. My father was an artist and a performer. When my father was a young boy, he would take part in street performances that was popular in the Philippines to make some money. I may not contain the skills to play an instrument but I do have some knowledge of rhythm. Like my father, I am also a performer - I am a dancer.'

Note: Due to a late blog update, I have decided to only post my introduction from my narrative essay. I am a bit self-conscious about the public reading this certain piece of writing. Furthermore, I realized that it may no longer be necessary to post the rest since the assignment for class viewpoint and judgement has passed, and I had some thought of recycling this piece of work again for a future college prompt. However, if my readers wish for further reading, then I will consider to offer it.

“With Plenty to Prove” A Maricruz Marquez Interview

            “Prove people wrong,” that is Maricruz Marquez’s motto. Often random, she is very spontaneous and unique. At the age of eighteen, Maricruz has lived up to her slogan by learning to overcome the shame of her past friends’ doubt on her graduating school. Now she is the only out of her former friends to ever graduate Pacifica High School’s class of 2010. Furthermore, she is the only one who had the will continue her education by going college. She currently attends Oxnard College as undeclared, but in five years, she hopes to achieve and earn a degree at the age of twenty-three, so she can earn a job that will keep her satisfied for a lifetime. She also hopes to be able to later feel the power of independence by possessing her own house, and maybe raising a small family.

            Maricruz is the middle child of two siblings, and she lives in a ranch with two supporting parents. Along with her parents’ motivation, she receives the strength to achieve high for a better education. However, her deepest motivation is her grandmother, whom she is very close to. Her grandmother inspires her everyday to be strong and supportive of her family.

            Carefree and lighthearted, Maricruz enjoys her morning schedule at Oxnard College. She likes how college is convenient and close to home. With only three classes to attend, she calls herself an average student. No longer wanting to procrastinate, she hopes to improve her study habits and to avoid all the mistakes she made in high school. She also wants to improve her grades and her skills towards mathematics. By attending college, she has realized how everything is ruled by choice, whether it is to choose to succeed or not. Therefore, she chooses to succeed, so she can prove the stereotypes about her culture wrong.

Link to Maricruz Marquez's blog:

http://maricruzmarquez18.blogspot.com/

Why Don’t We Just Turn Off that Phone and Give it a Short Rest

Billions of text messages are sent each month. I should know this because my younger sister is one of these victims. Her messages alone are over ten thousand a month, with most of her messages containing single or double letters like ‘hi,’ or ‘k.’ Her text messages are more than my own and my parents’ text messaging count combined! I am so glad that we have an unlimited text messaging plan!

I agree that there are several great pros to texting. They allow us to keep up with the latest information, and give us the ability to stay in touch when we are unable to talk. Although I do not enjoy texting often, texting has given me the benefit to have more control over my conversations. Since there are a few friends and relatives that I prefer avoiding to talk on the phone to, quick text messages suffice. I also have the ability to think about how I want to respond to some of the text message, and this helps prevent small misunderstandings and fights.

Texting is also a great way to flirt with someone new. Flirting over text builds the excitement and attraction that may later build a stronger relationship. It kind of brings back the elementary game of passing notes. In addition, texting can be a great way to hide certain feelings; especially to someone I may have just met. Since I am the type of person who can get quite nervous and fidget, a simple text message will not express this and hint the person. Instead they can just assume that I am attracted to them in the same way that they might be to me and we can work on getting to know a little more about one another without dealing with nervous laughter and stupid jokes to break the ice.

Since texting is a norm to most teens and younger generation, we must start learning how to limit ourselves. Texting can become quite a distraction to others, and we often can become addicted. We may become addicted to the point where we become unaware of our surroundings and cause certain accidents. It is better to sooner identify this obsession so we may end this habit by turning off our phones and taking a little break.

Boring Nonsense and Embarrassment

I grew up in a restricted home, so television was limited when I was a child. I was only allowed an hour during school nights, and weekends depended on the wellness of my behavior. Three hours only meant that my father was in a good mood, so it was also a chance in luck. As a child, it was typical to only live for cartoons, so I was never fond of the channels that displayed real actors and live scenes. Therefore, when I had reached middle school, a controlled schedule had benefit myself to not depend much on television.

            I barely discovered reality shows after hearing a few conversations about American Idol. Feeling a bit of an outcast, I decided to watch a few reality series. Soon, I was instantly hooked to shows like Project Runway, Punk’d, The Hills, Keeping Up with the Kardashians, and America’s Best Dance Crew. Now there are shows on MTV like MADE, 16 and Pregnant, Teen Mom, and Jersey Shore. Where is the world coming to? I have always thought MTV stood for music television, not reality television.

            Nowadays, college has kept me busy, so I watch television on occasions, but rarely any reality television. I think one of the reasons why I watched reality television in the first place is because it gave me something to gossip about. Maybe it was also due to the enjoyment of playing the psychiatrist and analyzing the behavior of other people. Another appealing factor of these reality programs are the unusual, yet interesting, locations that are filmed. The boundaries of nature and survival alone can make a fascinating show. By having a bunch of people from different backgrounds and some challenges that most of us hope to never face can result to excitement and humor. But the real reason for these reality shows might be for those who want to feel better about themselves. Similar to going to a fast food restaurant, people would feel more self-assured to not be the fattest person in the row.

            Many reasons why some watch these reality shows is because it is often on every paid program. I believe the one of the problems are that these reality shows are much cheaper to produce and they have a better chance on making money through multiple seasons than scripted shows with the best writers, directors, and actors. Although, I have to admit that there are some reality shows that are getting better in creativity and quality. There are the shows that deal with hoarding, addiction, medical issues, obesity and other traumatic situations in life, so for those who know someone who may suffer in these conditions may learn how others go through life and through attempts to deal with them. Exposing some viewers to these types of problems can help open their minds and get a better sense of understanding.

            There are many reasons why reality television will stay popular due to high appeal and quality. Therefore, as long as people volunteer to be filmed being themselves in various circumstances, reality television will continue. Nevertheless, the real question is why would anyone want to put themselves through boring nonsense and embarrassment in the first place?

Fast Foods Have Become Bigger, Stronger, and Smarter.

McDonald’s was my favorite place. As a child, I considered it to be a fun land because of the grand playhouse that was visible through its glass walls. Those red cardboard happy meal boxes never gave a slight disappointment because I always found a free collectible toy in every container. For a child, going to McDonald’s was a treat. My father would only reward me a trip there if I had received good marks on my report card. However, the salty French fries were my favorite to scoff down my throat, and the hamburger will usually be left untouched and my coca cola drink will be left half-empty. Fast food was not an issue in the past since I was only in it for the collectible toys and French fries. My grandmother had always served homemade meals daily, so eating healthy was not much of a concern.

As we grow older, we become prone to laziness so we no longer choose to make our own healthy choices. Instead, we will rather make a quick drive through any fast food restaurant and eat a meal that will suffice. After entering college, I have relied myself more to fast food. It is quite embarrassing enough to say that I almost eat it everyday. A perfect warm glazed donut with a tall hot white chocolate macchiato to get through the morning, some sweet mandarin chicken entrée to get though the afternoon, and a juicy carne asada burrito to finish the night. Nevertheless, I have come to my senses to change these habits. After giving myself a few hours each day to make my own meals, I rarely feel the urge to eat out. By taking the time to make small snacks during the day is helpful too. Not only does it feel fulfilling for a short time, it also helps save a few dollars everyday. Exercising is another helpful way to balance a better routine. Rather than taking the time to go to a gym and spend an amount full of money, a quick jog around the neighborhood is simpler to do every morning.

It is hard to ignore these fast food restaurants when they are seen daily in advertisements. Outdoors, they are seen on almost every block and in shopping areas like the mall. Not only do they attack the minds of kids with their fun houses and toys, they also appeal late night viewers. They offer promotions like the dollar menu, five-dollar meals, and limited time games like monopoly. Furthermore, most of them are open for twenty-four hours, which is very tempting to late night workers. They even attract those who watch their health and weight with their ‘nutrition menus.’ In this new era, fast foods have become bigger, stronger, and smarter. 

Aspiration Becoming a Reality

We live in a world that is full of obstacles--obstacles that we can only overcome due to hard work and sacrifices. Life was not meant to be easy. I have walked this earth for only nineteen years, yet to cover each and every aspect about my life and my experiences would take thousands of pages to fill.

The day I first felt the warm California sun beat against my skin was the day I was reunited with my mother and my younger sister. Since then, my mother single-handedly began her new American life, struggling to balance her minimum wage income in order to keep food in our stomachs and a roof above our heads. It was nothing compared to her life back in the Philippines, where she once had a degree in dentistry and had family and friends to work alongside with. Now that we’re in California, her dentistry degree is worthless--the closest she gets to her former job is making false teeth in a small industrial setting.

And if that wasn’t enough, my family has grown since we began our lives in California. Between my sister and my brother, I am the oldest. My brother came along after my mother met a new man--a man who stands respectfully beside my mother.

I still stand undecided on what to do with my remaining time, so for now I have been considering my mother’s dream of pursuing a career in the medical field. Sometimes the paths we choose are just too difficult to follow, difficult to the point at which we let others decide what is best for us, for we believe it to be wisdom coming from a form full of experience. It is thus that I now walk on this familiar path over and over, believing it to be what I personally desire, fooling myself time and time again. I had even promised my father in our last connection of eleven memorable years that I would pursue this career just for him before I was left wondering whether or not he had taken his foot off this world.

So why did I advance to college and continue school? It's quite simple really: mainly to earn a degree to receive a higher paying job--maybe to even educate myself and learn a skill. But it may also be this: to find the reason worth living for--to find ourselves and learn what we are truly capable of and to discover where our passion resides. Having a successful education is the only pathway to a successful future. In order to reach my full potential and gain this obscure knowledge, I know that I will have to work hard, just like my mother does everyday to keep us on our feet with smiles plastered on our faces. I plan to be the first in my family to earn a college degree, not only to gain pride, but also to truly become a good role model for my younger siblings and for my mother not to regret my being. So as a nurse, it may not be that bad. I may even find the fulfillment I am looking for there, maybe not just for my own wishes, but to also give back to my community and to my family for their sacrifices towards my advance to a better future. Therefore, fulfilling this accomplishment can help my other aspirations become a reality.